Retrospective Thoughts
In reading about my expulsion
from Bible College and arrival in NY you may be thinking, “That’s pretty neat.
What a great experience for Bob.” If you are thinking anything along those
lines I want to disabuse you of the thought. Yes, it was wonderful meeting the
Spanish-speaking Christians of NY and I treasure what they taught me and most
of all their friendship. I also treasure George Will – I have been blessed to
know him and without my early exposure to our inner life in Christ, which came
through George, my life would be much the poorer.
On the other hand, I didn’t have
an adult male or males mentoring me, guiding me, directing me, and holding me
accountable. I had been a poster boy for The Little Church in NW D.C. and for
the church in Silver Spring, MD. Then I was a poster-boy of sorts for the NY
circles I was in – and George, well, George I’m sure did the best he could with
me, but I don’t recall direction or challenge from him either.
I had been a Christian for less
than a year after my arrival in NY – and this poster boy was anything but
mature, in fact I was markedly immature and self-centered. I needed a framework
within which to live and I didn’t have it. I needed accountability and didn’t
have it. I was building a house without a foundation and it was not a good
thing.
The fact that I could speak publicly
and that I knew the Bible reasonably well (I use the term "knew" in a
sense of storyline and data rather than in a sense of understanding and wisdom)
didn't mean that I had internal character or maturity. I've seen this mistake
made throughout my life in the church, with both young and old. How many times
have I seen a successful businessperson come to Christ and be given a position
of leadership in the church without a period of discipleship? Too many. It's
the same thinking.
This lack of direction and
accountability would cost me dearly in my early adult life – and so my point is
that responsible accountable relationships are critical in formative years
(actually in all seasons of life) and that if you are young that you should
seek out older folks to mentor you – and ask them to hold you accountable. If
you are older – consider approaching younger people to come alongside them in
an intentional and accountable fashion – not controlling, but accountable,
there is a difference.
If you are a pastor or church
elder – every young person in your congregation should have someone walking
alongside him or her. The liftoff is critical for the Space Shuttle, if its
trajectory is off the mission will be off; yet we let our teenagers and young
adults launch their lives without helping them with their trajectory, we
abdicate responsibility. Whatever the reasons we do this we need to get over
it, take the risk, and get involved in the lives of our teenagers and young
adults – and this includes young married couples.
Our young people need much more
than programs or cool music or hip-hop or “contemporary” services and events –
they need relationships – which seem to be one of the things we don’t have time
for anymore.
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