Bumper Cars

Our neighbor is playing in a 7 – 8 years old basketball league for boys. They play six – minute quarters and fouls are seldom called, if fouls were called the games would last all day. There is a lot of shooting but generally not much scoring. We went to a game a week ago in which our young friend’s team did not score a single point in one quarter. 

I’m not sure if pinball or bumper cars best describes the game. Not only does the basketball bounce around the court, but the kids bounce off each other – I’m surprised they don’t wear football gear. 

Some kids get the ball and freeze, not knowing what to do with it. Most get the ball and shoot. They shoot whether they are under the basket, at the three-point line, or at half-court, they shoot whether there is a defender in front of them or not, whether there are three defenders in front of them or not, they shoot if the defender is a foot taller or not…they shoot, shoot, shoot. The only consistency in the shooting is that the ball will eventually come back to earth, whether it will come down in the court or out-of-bounds is, of course, another matter. 

If there are any assist leaders, it is purely accidental. Passing the ball to a teammate is a sign of weakness. 

The kids play hard, and they play tough, and generally they play good naturedly. There is pushing and banging and holding and falling on the floor, on the ball, and on one another. But they keep going. Controlled chaos. Bumper cars. 

Is it possible we are all playing in this league and don’t know it? Is it conceivable that we’re all in bumper cars, banging into each other, sometimes intentionally, most times (let us hope) in ignorance?

Is it possible that we just aren’t as smart as we think we are, and that we’ve been relationally stupid at times, really, really dumb? Is it likely we have shot the ball too much, not passed it enough, and knocked others down in our confusion and disorientation? 

In my own season of life, I have looked back, by God’s grace (though it doesn’t always feel like grace!) and seen myself in certain times and thought, “O my, I didn’t see that. I didn’t understand. I could have been more thoughtful. How selfish I was. How immature.” 

I also see others with more mercy and grace and forgiveness, for as I have been blind, others have been blind. We’ve all played bumper cars, We’ve all, at least I think all, have played in the 7 – 8 years old basketball league. 

I once met a former pastor who had been ill treated by a church – not an unusual occurrence. He and his wife had been through hell, also not an unusual occurrence. He said to me, “If they (the congregation) had realized what they were doing, they wouldn’t have done it.” 

That observation has stayed with me and I have remembered it when ill has been done to me, but also when I have “seen” the times I have harmed others. I have done things without realizing what I was doing, to my shame. 

A few weeks ago one of my neighbors was complaining about another neighbor who he felt had been rude to him, and he told me, “I’m through with him.” 

Now these guys have known each other for years. They can both be abrupt, but that’s just the way they are. It’s just bumper cars. To allow one or two bangs from a bumper car to upset a relationship is not too bright, we can learn from the boys’ basketball league. We all have our flat spots, we all have our blind spots – and it can be a relief to realize that and get on with life. 

I don’t care how long you park your new car away from other cars in the shopping center parking lot, eventually it will have a scratch or mark – either caused by someone else or self-inflicted. Even if others don’t see it, you’ll know it’s there. 

When I watch our young friend’s basketball games, I think, “Yep, this is life. If only we could learn from them. We’re all in bumper cars, if only we could learn to have fun at it, be forgiving, and play the game.”

“Be kind to one another, tender-hearted, forgiving each other, just as God in Christ also has forgiven you” (Ephesians 4:32).