Lemuel and Rosa and Duke’s Mayonnaise – Part 2

Upon entering Food Lion, Lemuel glanced up at the product descriptions at the end of the aisles and saw the aisle that had mayonnaise. Walking down the aisle he saw the mayonnaise section with two national brands that bombard the consumer with advertising and alongside them Duke’s – which is the only national brand made without sugar (ain’t that sweet!).

Duke’s, as any history major knows, was formulated, produced, and first sold by Eugenia Thomas Duke in Greenville, S.C. in the early 20^th century. She started in the sandwich business and as part of her business she made her own mayonnaise. As the sandwich endeavor rapidly grew it became apparent that its success was largely due to the tasty mayonnaise, and around 1923 Eugenia started a separate enterprise focused on the production and selling of mayonnaise. Demand became too much to keep up with and in 1929 she sold her business to the C.F. Sauer Company (which is celebrating its 130^th year anniversary in 2017). Later she moved to California to be with her daughter and opened a sandwich business there.

Now we need to note a few salient historical and cultural points. Firstly, you may wonder why, even if her daughter lived in California, Eugenia would leave South Carolina and move there – South Carolina was not the dust bowl. Historians are still arguing over why she moved out yonder leaving the land of low-country cuisine with its shrimp and grits and its gators, after all, California ain’t got no gators – and there ain’t nothing quite like taking a stroll at night wondering whether your next step might lead to the amputation of your toes…or worse.

We also need to note that there were two Dukes whose products have been widely disseminated across our land, the Mayonnaise Dukes and the Tobacco Dukes. Now these next questions may appear on the final exam so please take notice, “Which product tastes better on a sandwich, mayonnaise or tobacco? Which of these two products is likely to take your taste away so that can’t fully taste the sandwich? Which of these two products is more likely to kill you?”

I think Duke University got the nickname the Blue Devils from students turning blue as they were choking on Mr. Duke’s cigarettes. Which would you rather do, smoke and turn blue or eat delicious mayonnaise and smile and sing and skip and dance and…oh yes…breathe? (This may also be a test question). Ever make a paste out of tobacco and spread it on a sandwich? Think about it.

Another historical point is that C.F. Sauer, the company that purchased Duke’s Mayonnaise, was founded and is still based in Richmond, VA. So while Duke’s may have started in South Carolina, and while it may have continued to be produced in South Carolina, it is owned by a Virginia company. I think Virginians can have some satisfaction in this, even be it small, because South Carolina is the group that got us into that nasty war a few years back – frankly I think South Carolina ought to pay us reparations. Anyway, Duke’s belongs to us’uns and not you’uns, even though we choose to employ you’uns to make mayonnaise for us’uns.

Over the years Duke’s Mayonnaise has spread across the country. One of my brothers lives in Fall Creek, WI and there is a Walmart in Chippewa Falls that sells Duke’s. This is bittersweet news to me because I’d like to be able to tell him that he can’t get it where he lives. On the other hand, folks across the country could use a little culture.

To be continued…

Lemuel and Rosa and Duke’s Mayonnaise

Lemuel told me that he stopped at Food Lion yesterday to pick up some mayonnaise. Earlier in the week a friend had given him manna from his garden, you may know manna as tomatoes. If you don’t associate home-grown tomatoes as manna, then with all due respect (and pity) you ain’t from around here.

In my own life I recall that when Vickie and I lived in MA and friends from around here were coming to visit, that when they asked if they could bring us anything we didn’t have to think twice, “Hanover tomatoes”. If you don’t know what Hanover tomatoes are then with all due respect (and pity) you ain’t from around here.

When I meet someone from around here who doesn’t like tomatoes I give them my sympathies and ask them why they don’t move – what’s the point of living here and not loving tomatoes. Then once I establish that they aren’t moving I ask them if I can have their share of tomatoes.

Lemuel and his missus were going to have BLTs last night and needed mayonnaise. If you are from around here you immediately recognize that this couple committed the eighth deadly sin, if you ain’t from around here you don’t know no better – to be out of mayonnaise during tomato season is not one of those tweeny-weeny sins, it is a deadly sin. I’ve known unfortunate things to happen in families that have run out of mayonnaise, I’ve known life-long friends to come to blows over the last spoonful in a jar, I’ve known couples in counseling because one or the other failed to notify the other when the last dollop was gone so that it could be replenished. The smart family has extra mayonnaise, the intelligent family estimates their anticipated mayonnaise consumption at the start of ‘mater season and stocks a supply – you don’t fly across the Pacific without plenty of fuel, and no thoughtful family is going to risk entering the tomato season without ensuring a supply of mayonnaise. (I hope Lemuel and his missus don’t read this!).

I’ve been told that some jurisdictions have arrested grocery store owners who have jacked up the price of mayonnaise during hurricane season when folks think they might have to hunker down. I think that is wrong, I don’t think they should be arrested, just deported. I understand that one citizenship ceremony on July 4 includes the requirement that the new citizens partake of either a BLT or a straight tomato and mayonnaise sandwich. If you don’t understand all of this…you ain’t from around here.

Now don’t get me wrong, if you ain’t from around here but move here there is hope; just as in the ancient world not everyone was a Greek, but everyone could learn to speak Greek and thereby become cultured, so the door of Southern hospitality is open to refugees from other regions who have not been initiated into the delight and comfort of home-grown tomatoes, especially Hanover tomatoes. We all need help from time-to-time and most folks are open to helping those unfortunates who have never tasted tomato manna – most are open I say, not all. I admit that I struggle with sharing tomatoes, which is pretty sad considering that others share tomatoes with me – but I digress, this is about Lemuel and Rosa and Duke’s…not about me.

I see that I’ve written all that I can right now, so we’ll pick this up in the next post. By the way, don’t leave home today without checking on your stock of mayo.

We All Matter

“The priest looked puzzled also, as if at his own thoughts; he sat with knotted brow and then said abruptly: ‘You see, it’s so easy to be misunderstood. All men matter. You matter. I matter. It’s the hardest thing in theology to believe.” 
― G.K. Chesterton, The Complete Father Brown

Tuesday night we went to the baseball game. Wednesday afternoon we were back for another baseball game. Crowds are interesting to me. So many people, dressed so many ways, doing so many things. As I write this it is early in the morning, soon I’ll leave home and go out into more crowds, more people. Some will be nice, some indifferent, some perhaps inconsiderate. Some drivers may be rude and dangerous – it seems to be getting worse. 

This afternoon I have an important meeting, there will be people there I have never met; it may be tense, I hope not. I wonder how it will go.

Will I remember that everyone who I meet today matters? Will I remember that they all matter to God and that they should matter to me?

When I am in crowds I often think, “Jesus died for that person, and that person, and that person. Lord, draw them to you.” I think, “There is no one here for whom Jesus did not die. There is no one here whom Jesus does not love.”

It’s one thing to think high and lofty theological or philosophical thoughts, but they don’t mean anything if we can’t grapple with the fact that everyone matters. If we can’t love our neighbor then what’s the point? If we can’t learn to love the unlovable and touch the untouchable then why bother? When an animal is hurting it can be dangerous, it can bite, it can tear – but we hopefully do what we can to help and heal. If that’s true with us and animals – why not more so with each other?

We all matter. The question is whether I will live like they do today, will I pay attention to others and do what I can to help them?

How am I going to live today?

What about you?