A Friendship Gate – 2

One might think that a friendship gate needs to be weeded in order to be maintained, this is not exactly true. The best maintenance for a friendship gate is use – it must be used to be maintained; and if wear leads to maintenance that’s a good thing. Paths that are well-worn are paths clearly defined, paths not overgrown with weeds. Friendship gates well-used and used well may require the occasional weed to be pulled from their path and may require the oiling of hinges, but that weed is pulled as a footnote on a page – it is not the main text on a page, and the oil is applied to facilitate the smooth opening of the gate as a matter of course – to ensure the continued smooth operating of the gate, to preserve the joy of its operation.

Friendship gates are overgrown with weeds and volunteer trees when a friend moves away; sadly, moving away has many forms – it is not always physical; it may be that the soul of one friend moves away from another, that barriers are built, that callouses are formed, that a puncture in the relationship that is not closed up leads to a larger hole and then a breach, and then a chasm, and then a canyon seemingly too great to traverse.

Gates such as these carry vulnerability, and vulnerability entails hurt and misunderstanding; the nature of friendship in our fallen condition means that there will be hurt and misunderstanding – understanding that misunderstanding is an element of our fractured condition should mean that we are quick to forgive, quick to heal the puncture, quick to pull the weed, quick to embrace, quick to open the gate again and again and again – knowing that friendship is at stake. We ought to respond to damage to friendship the way firefighters respond to fire – contain it and extinguish it. We ought to be like sailors on a ship whose hull has been breached and with sea water pouring in – contain the damage and restore the ship.

God called Abraham His friend. Jesus says to His followers, “You are my friends.” It is one thing to be created by God, it is another to be His son or daughter – it is still another thing to be His friend. Friendship is a mystery that the Father and the Son invite us to experience in them…and with each other.

There is no friendship gate quite like the Cross; no gift in life quite like friendship.